Confessions of a Bottom Lane Summoner

After trying to make the other post nicer, I figured I would post the other side of this.The one that’s not accusatory or pissy, just the side that wants this resolved and would prefer more cuddles.

• I know you enjoy having me there and knowing that if you say something I’ll respond, but some clarification before you ask me to call you would be nice. Like, “Hey, I’m going to read this book, mind sitting on skype with me?” That way I know what I’m getting into not sitting there getting my hopes up… I mean… I am good for conversation.

• Same with the calling and adding me to another call. I get really happy when I think you just want to talk to me on skype, but when you’re all like “Skype?” and add me to a call with other people it sucks. It’s like saying “Hey you’re not good enough for conversation so I’m going to falsely lure you into a call.” I know that’s not what it is, but that’s what it feels like. I’d just like clarification that you want me to join a call with everyone else. So that way I won’t be let down when you answer and make me smile and then add the rest of the group and stomp all over my feelings. I mean, here you are getting jealous of me talking to other guys and yet you never seem to feel like talking to me, not even when you ask to talk to me.
• And then you ask me to play league with you and you don’t seem to converse with me or you talk to everyone else in between games and only consider my presence when you’re wondering if I’m going to play again. I loved playing league with everyone before. It was fun, it was awesome. Now, it’s just a hassle. I love the fact that you want me to play with you. I hate the fact that when you “want me to play with you” it means “you and all of the other people you know that play league”. 
  
• Now, the Netflix one is a weird one. It sounds really needy, and it probably is, but you wanted to talk and then you’re all like “I’m going to go and watch this show on Netflix.” Maybe I was just being a stuck up bitch by not asking and just sort of waiting for an invite, but… we were supposed to be talking and I just sort of figured that you might have had some consideration for me. Especially coming from the guy who bought two copies of the same movie so that you could watch it at the same time as someone else from across town… It’s the same situation, is it not? And yet…
• The saying “I may come over today” is not something you should do if you don’t plan on coming over. Tell me that you are not coming over before you don’t come over and have me sitting next to my phone staring at the screen for the entire day. If you don’t want to then say so, if you’re busy then say so. You don’t have to tell me why, but when I’m sitting at home and suddenly you’re playing games it’s a slap in the face. It’s saying “Hey, you’re not worth my time and this video game is more entertaining than you.”
• Am I a dull person? Did I do something wrong? Is there something you’re not telling me? I feel like crap today and having you be all “You played a great support, I’ll come over earlier than I was already planning to.” Doesn’t help much at all. It feels like I have to compete to earn your attention, or that I have to do good in a video game to win your affections. It feels great that you were actually planning on coming over today, but this for an occasion that YOU really want to attend. 
• I hate drawing attention to my relationships, especially to my friends. It’s great to flaunt it, but there’s a time and place. The time and place does not include every time and everywhere. People are especially sensitive (when they aren’t in a relationship) to other people’s relationships. Going around and shoving it down their throats doesn’t make them feel good and they’ve already grasped the concept after the first time that you tell them the information. Hell, I understand that you probably want to assert your dominance a little as well, but will you just… tone it down? Or do it when I’m not around? I play video games with a lot of males… it is sort of the way of the internet… but you brag to them that I’m your girlfriend and then after you’re done bragging (or asserting your dominance over me in a way that is rude to others and, at times, has been sort of rude to me is poor taste) you don’t treat me as if I’m anything to brag about in the first place.  

I don’t know how to be any more direct about these problems… I’ve literally spelled them out. 

I’m not a social experiment…
I’m not a project….

I have feelings…
And you’ve been stepping all over them for a few days now…

I thought it was because of the talk you had with your Dad, but now I’m not so certain… Because you’ve changed and even your sarcasm hurts.

Damn it… I need sleep.

I’m still deciding whether or not to even send these rants to you…

 

K/D/A

0/7/0

I’m hardcore feeding right now.

Well… it seems that I only seem to post when there’s something pissing me off. And this has been pissing me off for quite a while. 

And I really want to strangle someone.

Diving straight into my rant of the day:

You’re at top and you’re solo against a duo. It’s not horrible at first, but you know that if you trip up they’re going to grab you and kill you. They start to push quite hard then and you’re pressed up against your tower. You’re all like, “Hey, I need help up top or this lane is lost.” 

Your jungle does absolutely nothing and another person on your team calls for your jungle and they run down to bot from the top jungle. 

One of the people at top dives you, the other finishes off the tower, and you die. On the other hand, your jungle got two kills and then finished off mid for a triple kill. Those three kills helped him to carry the entire team and win with three times the amount of kills that the enemy team had all together.

You had the least amount of kills of both. Your lane was also pushed the most.

There’s this wonderful thing called teamwork and when you neglect someone on your team, you are not working for the benefit of the team. You’re working for yourself and being selfish.

Now for the non-league part of this rant…

Seriously? When you’re all like, “Skype?” You should really talk to that person. ESPECIALLY when that person is your significant other.

Things you shouldn’t do to your significant other:
- Invite them to talk and then drag them into another call with four other people
-Call them and then not talk the ENTIRE time when it’s just the two of you and when it’s in a group
-invite them to play a league match and then ignore them during the game even when they’re like “oh hey I need help” and it takes a different person to get their attention to get them to come and help you
-Watch stuff on netflix and not invite them to join you while still in a call with them
-Invite them to play league with you and then invite three other people (Seriously… I know it’s a game that you play with multiple people but when you ask your significant other to play sometimes they assume that you just want to play with ONLY THEM or talk to only them on skype. But no. Never. Why would you ever want to talk to your significant other? I’m sorry. I should never assume that I actually matter. My bad.)
-Say you might come over and then not tell them you’re not going to come over. (Do you know how annoying this is? Do you know how bad this feels? “I’m assuming that since the sun is going down and you’re not here you aren’t coming over today.” “**Playing on Minecraft** Oh yeah. I’m not.” Thanks for the consideration. It’s not like I spent most of the day waiting.)

Oh, and happy anniversary…

It was yesterday…

There’s always those games where you’re just like, “Wow. I shouldn’t have done that.” or “Why did I not ward?”… yeah, you get the point. We make terrible choices, we pick terrible items, etc. The point of the game though is to get better and to know what to get next time so you don’t end up on your ass dead for 75 seconds while the enemy team is sitting there taking your inner turrets.

Never would I have ever thought that league was relatable to life. 

Let’s say that you’re support and your adc is derping around doing what an adc does while you frantically try to keep them alive in the early stages of the game. You don’t even have your ult yet. That’s when you see the other team’s adc run into the bush in the river, and your wards just ran out. You move backwards; obviously your adc has enough sense to not go towards the menacing bushes and get jumped on, right?

Wrong.

Your adc gets jumped, but instead of them dying you die by attempting to save the adc’s life. The other team gets first blood. Now, you feel like shit. You’re slightly annoyed that your adc has no map awareness, but you feel as if you could have done more. Like pinged. But no big, it’s early in the game. 

Later in the game though, your adc sees people jump into the bush and you’re on your way to help your adc. Your adc moves back, but you think it’s only because they’re waiting for the minions that you’re bringing along with you. You think that the two of you are going to push.

And you’re wrong again.

You’re jumped and you die. Your adc is furious, talking about how you’re being bad and how you should have more map awareness. Even though your adc did the exact same thing earlier in the game, you take the blame because they were the one that pointed it out.

Lessons learned (in game and in life):

1. If you think something will hurt, or is hurting you, make sure your team is aware of it. (Don’t think that your not so obvious hints are going to make everyone aware of your needs.)
2. Do not try and reverse things around on your teammates. (Two wrongs don’t make a right - especially if the other person is oblivious because you’re just going to make things worse for both of you.) 
3. Don’t try to make it better by making it worse.
4. Be reliable. You don’t want to be the person that everyone is bitching at for ksing or for feeding. Be good in team fights. Know your roles. (Be the shoulder to lean on rather than the reason why they need a shoulder in the first place.)

K/D/A of the day - 0/2/0